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How to Control Negative Thoughts

Do you seem to wake up on the wrong side of the bed every day? If you find that negative thoughts are starting to control your life, take action before stress starts weighing you down. Learn to identify and eliminate negative thoughts, then replace them with positive exercises. Not only will opportunities start to present themselves, but you'll have the power to change your frame of mind, as well as your day.

Method One of Three:
Eliminating Negative Thinking


  1. Identify your negative thoughts.     Some might immediately spring to mind, but if you have trouble pinpointing them, consider journaling. Write down a sentence or two describing the negative thoughts whenever you have them. [1]
    • Look for thoughts that make you feel sad or discouraged, such as: blaming or shaming yourself for things that are not your fault, interpreting simple mistakes as indicative of personal failings, or imagining small problems are bigger than they are ("making a mountain out of a molehill").
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  2. 2
    Stop the negative thought immediately. Once you've identified your negative thought, counteract it by saying something positive to yourself. For example, instead of saying, "I'm having a really bad morning," try saying something like, "This morning is rough, but my day will get better." Keep your mind on the positive.[2]
    • If you're struggling with this, keep this one trick in mind: never say something to yourself that you wouldn't say to someone else.[3] Remind yourself to stay positive and it may just become a habit.
    • Recognise your negative thinking
      The first step towards increasing positive thoughts is to start decreasing negative thoughts.

      It sounds simple, but research shows that when a positive and a negative event occur on the same day, we tend to focus more heavily on the negative.

      For example, if you sleep through your alarm and miss your first meeting of the day, what is your initial reaction? Do you feel stressed, angry and frustrated? Do you think: "My entire day will now be a disaster" or, "I can't cope with this added pressure I've created"?

      Writing your thoughts down on paper can help illustrate how illogical our thinking can be.

      Ask yourself what evidence there is that these thoughts are actually true.

      Have you always thought like this? What is a healthier, more realistic thought?

      Exercise: Over the next few weeks, whenever negative thoughts pop into your head, jot them down in a notebook. Examine these thoughts and the internal stories you tell yourself.
      Make the change
      After writing your thoughts down, can you identify any ANTs? Are you over-generalising, jumping to conclusions, catastrophising or personalising situations?

      We can't always control what happens to us, but we can control how we react to events.

      Exercise: The next time you find yourself thinking an ANT, pause and reframe your thinking. If your reaction to missing a meeting is: "My day will now be a disaster," reframe it to: "This wasn't a great start but I'll focus on what I can get finished." If you feel overwhelmed by your workload, tell yourself: "I can do this. I've had worse days than this and coped."
      Practice makes perfect
      When we think positively, we feel more alive, more engaged, energetic and productive. Who wouldn't want to feel like this?

      Knowing how CBT works is one thing, but now you need to put it into practice. Remember, CBT is not a quick fix. It takes time, effort and persistence to master these skills. A good start is to ask yourself what you are thinking right now and how realistic this is. Now it's over to you.
      Don't be afraid to talk to someone
      If you have been experiencing any feelings of sadness, anxiety, loneliness or depression for the past few weeks, please make sure you seek out a medical professional or talk to a psychologist.